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Self-confidence is one of the few personality traits that affects the quality of almost all areas of human life. Along with an increase in self-confidence, the effectiveness of human actions increases, relationships with other people improve, new connections are acquired and unnecessary connections are cut off. A confident person is better motivated to achieve what he wants to achieve, more quickly attuned to success and achieves it with less effort. Self-confidence gives its carrier a huge number of advantages and even makes a person happier, therefore, if you are not self-confident enough, you should immediately think about the development of this most important personality trait. It's not difficult, just start taking the steps outlined in this article on a daily basis, and you will not only become more confident in yourself, but also change your life for the better.

55 Ways to Become More Confident:

  • 1. Be a confident person. Make a decision henceforth in all situations and in any place to speak and act with confidence, to be more decisive and bolder than ever before.
  • 2. Stop complaining about shortcomings. Each person has disadvantages, but there is one important point- confident people do not attach too much importance to them and do not remember them at the most inopportune times.
  • 3. Take care of your strengths. Let your strengths become your mainstays in life, work on their further development and make them even stronger.
  • 4. Stop underestimating your abilities. You should study all your abilities and trust yourself that, if necessary, you can complete a familiar task, even if it looks a little more difficult this time.
  • 5. Start learning what you want to excel at. Stop just daydreaming about what kind of talented or capable person you could become, and how many enthusiastic looks would be directed at you. Start taking real steps towards becoming one in reality.
  • 6. Review your rulebook. Your own rules are what should strengthen your spirit and make you stronger. Review your rules and remove those that hinder your success, and add rules that can definitely make you more successful and more confident.
  • 7. Make a list of the things you like. Let yourself be distracted for an hour from the hustle and bustle of your everyday life and reflect on what you really like, write down a list of the things you like on a piece of paper and save it until next time.
  • 8. Develop your skills. Are you a programmer, designer or copywriter? If this is the case, start perfecting your skills and become a top-notch expert in what you do.
  • 9. Pay attention to what you like. You have already made a list of things that you like, now, your task is to remember them as often as possible, especially at such moments when negative thoughts disturb you.
  • 10. Show concern for others. Treat other people with more benevolence, help those who are in difficult situations, especially if they are your close relatives or friends.
  • 11. Forget insecurity. The more often you remember your insecurity, the more difficult it becomes for you to deal with it, on the contrary, completely forgetting about it and not attaching much importance to its signs, you will get rid of it with great ease.
  • 12. Stop putting up with things that are unpleasant for you. Make a list of the things that you have to endure and begin to gradually and gradually eliminate those that are most detrimental to your emotional well-being.
  • 13. Pay attention to your surroundings. Stop analyzing your feelings and going through negative thoughts in your head, instead, direct all your attention to what is happening around you.
  • 14. Meet people. Communication is one of the basic needs of a person, do not deny yourself the opportunity to just chat and start a conversation with strangers. Do not be discouraged if one of these people is not in the mood for communication, next time you will be more fortunate.
  • 15. Stop comparing yourself to anyone else. There are many different people in the world, with a set of very different skills and abilities, and each of these people is unique. You are also unique, so comparing yourself to someone else is not very correct.
  • 16. Think of the 80-20 rule. The 80-20 rule states that 20 percent of the effort usually results in 80 percent of the result. This way, you don't need to be upset if 80 percent of your efforts were wasted - the remaining 20 percent will definitely bring results.
  • 17. Take it easy on your shyness. Treat your shyness as a feature, not a disadvantage. This will make your work on fixing it much easier.
  • 18. Stop berating yourself. Never scold yourself for mistakes or failure, in general, never scold yourself, even if it seems to you that there is a reason for this. What happened, what happened, draw conclusions, analyze the reasons for your mistakes and keep moving forward with new knowledge.
  • 19. Consider your doubts. Insecure people often doubt themselves, while most of their doubts do not have a solid foundation. And, nevertheless, this does not mean that all their doubts are empty. Consider your doubts and identify which ones may be justified, as well as how big the risk is that they will be justified.
  • 20. Get help. Remember that you are not alone in this world, there are many people in the world with the same problems. There are also people who coped with these problems and are ready to help others in this, do not be afraid to ask for help, someone will definitely help you.
  • 21. Do something stupid. You are a person, and like any person is imperfect in some way, and like any person you are not immune from committing stupidity. Do something stupid but safe for you and the people around you on purpose and laugh at yourself with others.
  • 22. Flirt. Light, meaningless flirting with a person of the opposite sex can cheer you up and add variety to your everyday environment. Of course, to use it, this person must adequately perceive flirting.
  • 23. Start exercising physically. A toned body is not only a guarantee of health and longevity, but also a source of self-confidence. Make it a rule to exercise daily.
  • 24. Learn to say no. Sometimes we find it difficult to say “no” to acquaintances, friends or relatives in response to their request, because at this moment we find ourselves under social pressure. And, nevertheless, remember: you do not owe anything to anyone, and you have the right to refuse a request to any person if you are really busy. Learn to refuse other people in a calm and confident manner.
  • 25. Identify the cause of insecure behavior. Try to identify what is holding you back from speaking and acting confidently. What thoughts come to you at this moment? Destroy negative beliefs that have hindered your self-confidence.
  • 26. Reflect on past successes. Many people are much more likely to recall their failures than successes, and as a result, they deliberately underestimate their abilities and give rise to further development of insecurity. Instead, at the slightest sign of negative thoughts, start thinking about your past successes.
  • 27. Put things in order. Put things in order in your house, your appearance and your head. Being organized will make you feel more confident and give you a sense of control over your own life.
  • 28. Listen to your intuition. Separate the voice of intuition from empty doubts, learn to discern them, and do as your heart tells you to.
  • 29. Remember the state of confidence. Think of a situation in which you felt and acted with maximum confidence. What caused confidence to appear? Was this reason internal or external? Try to restore the same mindset that supported your sense of confidence in the past. Remember the state of self-confidence and learn to invoke it in any situation.
  • 30. Watch your posture. Try to keep your back straight anywhere and at any time, and relax all other muscles not involved in maintaining posture.
  • 31. Find words of encouragement. Make a list of phrases and sentences that motivate you and make you feel confident. Write them down on a piece of paper or memorize them and read them when you are unsure.
  • 32. Learn to accept your insecurities. Your self-doubt is what you feel at one time or another, and it is most likely caused by a situation with which you are unfamiliar. Accept this and convince yourself that the next time you are in a similar situation, you will act differently.
  • 33. Befriend your fears. Fear is natural, it only becomes a problem when you don't take steps to overcome it. Therefore, use your fear as an opportunity to boost your confidence.
  • 34. Take it easy on your mistakes. You don't need to be upset about mistakes, but rather look at them as an opportunity for your learning and personal growth.
  • 35. Do everything in a new way. Please select new route for your trip to work or home, a new grocery store, a new way of doing your daily work. The more often you do something new and the more often you visit new places, the more confident you begin to feel in situations that are unfamiliar to you.
  • 36. Do something useful for the community. Being helpful to other people will boost your self-confidence tremendously.
  • 37. Be sure that you have enough strength. Whatever happens to you, remember that you have enough inner strength to cope with any, even the most difficult situation.
  • 38. Find your true goals. It’s easy to feel insecure when you’re out of place, and, conversely, by identifying your true goals and doing what you really care about, you’ll find that you can easily deal with insecurity.
  • 39. Take action. Stop sitting with folded arms. If a situation makes you feel insecure, then you should work on yourself and take real steps to eliminate your insecurity. Walk forward decisively whenever you feel it is necessary, this practice will help you gain self-confidence.
  • 40. Learn to control your body. The ability to control your body is a very important skill. Develop it. Learn to relax completely, release muscle tension and control unconscious movements. Study body language, model confident postures and gestures.
  • 41. Meet your future self. Imagine an image of your future self, a confident and decisive person, think about what he would do in a given situation or circumstances?
  • 42. Define your values ​​and stick to them. Try not to depend on strangers and opinions. Make your own list of values ​​and stick to them in any situation. Defend them if you really need to, and do as you see fit.
  • 43. Declare yourself. Stop being in the shadows, if you have something to offer, and you are sure that your offer is worthwhile, declare yourself and express your opinion. It will either be accepted or not, nothing terrible will happen again, and you will know that at least you have made an attempt.
  • 44. Have a plan of action. Learn to plan your goals. Make a plan of action for each next day, for each week, month, year, or any other period. Implement it day after day, the result will not be long in coming.
  • 45. Do your business on time. To become more confident in yourself, you need to start doing your things in due time. There is no need to put them off until tomorrow, this will only diminish your faith in yourself.
  • 46. ​​Learn from confident people. Observe confident people, note how they behave, how they speak, what sign language they use, copy their behavior. If necessary, ask for a couple of lessons on assertive behavior.
  • 47. Become an idea generator. Practice creating new, original ideas. Give unnecessary things a second life. Find new ways to use things. Reflect on what new things you can bring to your life. Just use your creativity.
  • 48. Surround yourself with positive people. Negative-minded people often unknowingly spoil the mood of those around them. Try to stay away from such people, or if you feel strong enough in yourself, charge them with positive energy and ideas. Try to be surrounded by positive, kind and cheerful people more often.
  • 49. Smile more often. Find a reason to smile as often as possible. Watch a funny video or movie, read anecdotes or funny stories. Meet your friends and have fun with them.
  • 50. Stop pleasing others. You don't have to adjust to other people - be yourself. If you don’t like something, you don’t have to do it just to please or please other people. Choose your own path in life.
  • 51. Visualize yourself as a confident person. Imagine, as vividly and vividly as possible, pictures of confident behavior in various situations with your participation. Day after day, scroll through these images in your head and try to act accordingly.
  • 52. Make up affirmations. Repetition of affirmations is one of the most effective ways to change your beliefs and inner mood. Start telling yourself that you are a confident person, that every day you become more confident and more confident in yourself. Repeat positive affirmations of your confidence every day at any free time.
  • 53. Find uplifting music. Good music can improve your mood and even boost your self-confidence. Find this kind of music and listen to it from time to time. In difficult times, just remember the motive and words.
  • 54. Understand that no one is better or worse than you. Having someone with abilities or skills that you don't have doesn't make that someone better than you. Admit that you are just different, but no worse or better than anyone else.
  • 55. Be here now. Learn to be here and now in any situation. Stop the flow of thoughts about the past and the future, stop disturbing your inner state of calm with negative thoughts. Be as focused as possible on what's going on around you, focus on action, not thinking.

Everyone can become more self-confident, all that is needed for this is to start taking real steps to change their way of thinking and behavior. As you work on yourself and follow the confidence-building techniques outlined in this article, you will learn to think, speak, and act with confidence in any situation. Don't be discouraged if you run into difficulties at the beginning of your journey to self-confidence, this is natural for any undertaking. Just keep moving forward and you will succeed. I wish you success!

This feeling grows and develops with us throughout life. It can not only be successfully strengthened, but also inadvertently created conditions for complete destruction. In today's article we will try to figure it out how to become a stronger, more decisive, confident girl / woman (advice from a psychologist) and not to lose the acquired skills over time.

What it is

This is a person's personal quality, based on three most important components.

  • Behavior. How a single individual demonstrates his strength.
  • Feeling. How he feels his own righteousness and assesses the impact on others.
  • Determination. Ability to make important decisions without delay.

These multifaceted manifestations are closely interconnected with self-esteem and personality temperament. The most common cause of lack of self-confidence is fear of the unknown. You never know what can await us beyond the distant turn on the path of life? Not everyone is able to openly and boldly look into the future.

But all this does not mean that overconfidence is good. Often, she is fraught with a much greater danger. With her, such negative qualities become inherent in people.

  • Excessive aggression. It manifests itself uncontrollably both in words and in deeds.
  • Infantilism. Indifference, which teens suffer more often than other categories.
  • Negativism. It is a bad habit to deliberately elevate yourself above others.

How is it in psychology to become a self-sufficient, relaxed and self-confident woman or girl? This means acquiring resistance to the influence of negative emotions. His ability to communicate with others directly depends on how successfully a person protects himself from fear, indignation or worries.

Reasons for uncertainty

As a rule, the origins of this feeling should be sought in early childhood. At the slightest manifestation of activity and interest in the world around, an individual usually receives shouts from adults: “Don't go!”, “You can't!”, “Don't touch!”. So easily and simply at the root, they destroy the first signs of initiative. But the parents are happy - their child has become quiet and obedient to everyone's envy.

Unwanted behavior is perceived by babies and mothers in very different ways. For some, this is a way to find out what is happening around, for others, disobedience, for which it is necessary to punish.

For greater objectivity, it is necessary to clarify that the absence of censure does not always guarantee the opportunity to understand, how to raise and gain confidence in a woman ... There are a number of other reasons:

  • family upbringing;
  • congenital characteristics;
  • fear of uncertainty;
  • low self-esteem;
  • excitement;
  • lack of striving for a goal;
  • conflict with oneself;
  • weakened willpower;
  • contradictions between external and internal.

Yes, the qualities caused by biology are almost unaffected, but social ones are completely in the power of man. Everyone is capable of fixing them.

Confidence structure

It is made up of directed emotions, decisiveness, the strength of the feelings experienced. With an uncontrolled demonstration of negativity, communication will be difficult. No one wants to be around someone who is constantly venting their anger at others.

Fear and constant agitation are powerful deterrents. The individual is shy, his vital activity tends to zero. How, according to the advice of a psychologist, can you learn to be more sociable and feel like a self-confident woman at work and in life?

People are divided into three categories based on the intensity of their self-confidence.

  • Overly confident, prone to aggression.
  • Decisive. The desire to contact others and heightened emotionality are their distinctive features.
  • Unsure. Those who lack emotions calmly dispense with communication and tend to negativism.

Uncertainty suggests two scenarios. A person either deliberately fenced himself off from difficulties, tries to hide, or goes into an aggressive state. In fact, there is a third way to solve a problem - solving difficult situations with words.

What to do

The first thing to realize is that confidence can be acquired. Of course, the effects of congenital characteristic features, but you should not use them to justify your own weakness. According to advice from psychologists on how to become a stronger, calmer, sociable and confident girl , it is necessary to act, and not be in expectation of a miracle.

Uncertainty and fears

This is perhaps the root of all troubles. To get rid of it, you need to understand what exactly makes you afraid. Knowing what you are fighting against increases your chances of success. Analyze your own feelings, concentrate and identify the sinister cause. Believe me, as soon as you visualize it for yourself and present it in full growth, it will seem much smaller and will not pose such a significant threat.

How to become self-confident and not remember the negative, indecision

Some people get caught up in negative experiences in life. Day after day, they confirm their inadequacy and inability to cope with difficulties, fishing out negative memories from their minds. But after all, our brain carefully stores not only the bad, but also the good. Wouldn't it be better to bring it out into the light every day?

The "repository" of images from the past requires a special attitude.

  • Get in the habit of focusing exclusively on the positive. Play them in your head before going to bed. Remember also about other people's achievements, rejoice at them and be charged with positive. In no case should you stoop to comparison.
  • Going through difficult life situations, get out of the "piggy bank" only what will help to cope with them and motivate you to be active.

How to restore self-confidence to a woman from the point of view of psychology? This will only happen if she refuses to focus on failure. Otherwise, a vicious circle awaits her, from which it is very difficult to escape. Consciousness slips, continues to absorb negative energy, and over time it becomes generally impossible to find at least something good in your memories.

Uncertainty as Self-Destruction

Absolutely each of us has an amazing talent, special potential and unique abilities inherent only to him. However, the fear of self-expression and active movement towards the goal turns these wonderful qualities into an empty space. So, when you plan to solve a certain problem, but at the same time feel that you are overcome by thoughts that deny the likelihood of success, you begin to doubt and in the end you do not even get down to business.

To emerge victorious from the situation and understand how to become a very cocky and attractive young girl , you will have to do self-development. You need to overcome yourself, destroy the wall of indecision, get rid of fears and resentments.

Exercise "Three reasons to live"

To say goodbye to insecurity once and for all, you should master the following method.

Each day, record three successful cases that you managed to complete. Let it be very insignificant, random, which were not originally planned. Notice even the little things. The main thing is that these small accomplishments are prerequisites for the emergence of faith in oneself. Depending on the individual perception of the world, the reasons may be as follows.

  • "I live for the sake of my family and friends."
  • "I want to make my cherished dream come true."
  • “My goal is to enjoy special moments.”

This list should be read regularly. Believe me, gradually there will be more achievements and you will understand how to be a calm, courageous and self-confident girl.

How to stop being afraid of social contact

Here it is important to give yourself the installation that everyone around you is also living people with their own character, interests, problems. Take a closer look at them.

  • Both you and your opponent are of equal importance, you are respected. Feel free to ask questions, be interested in details, express your opinion. Indeed, very often the barrier arises due to the subconscious setting of another person above the rest. Usually, this happens when interacting with bosses and parents. Remember, beyond the employee-manager relationship, everyone is on the same level.
  • Don't take anything negative personally. If you are not guilty of anything, then you should not worry. Most likely, the reason is hidden in someone else, perhaps in your interlocutor.
  • Get honest, be fair. Unjustified feelings of guilt invariably lead to self-destruction.

The psyche follows the body

In psychology, there is such a concept - "forcibly evoked emotions." For example, if you make a person laugh, they will have fun of their own accord. To overcome uncertainty, you should:

  • every time you meet with friends, shake hands or hug them;
  • be sure to maintain eye contact.

Gradually you will notice how your consciousness will begin to withdraw with real determination.

Challenge your weakness daily.

  • Watch your posture. Always keep your back straight, walk with your shoulders straightened, and do not lower your head. Take your time when walking, walk slowly. The only way confident girls behave. They do not run away, they proudly walk forward.
  • At any event, stay in the forefront. Try to be noticed, paid attention, invited to an active discussion. Yes, the first time will not be easy, but gradually you yourself will begin to be active and strive for action.
  • Don't underestimate your ability. Recognize them and value yourself for them. At your leisure, make a list of all your positive traits and skills and revise it regularly.
  • Learn to smile genuinely. With a smile on your face, it is much easier to overcome any difficulties.
  • Feel free to look your interlocutor in the eye. Trying to look away can be perceived as an intention to lie.
  • Take action, don't sit still. Show your potential in all kinds of areas.

Take advantage of these tips and you can become a more self-confident girl.

Confident person skills

All women need to master these skills:

  • persistence;
  • the ability to learn from their own mistakes;
  • find a compromise in difficult situations;
  • focus on important things;
  • take criticism calmly;
  • talk openly about your shortcomings, listen without unnecessary emotions to complaints from men.

Confidence and success

It is very important to believe in yourself at a certain stage in your life. This is the only way to gain self-confidence and determination. It is clear that this cannot be done without good reason. To do this, you need to develop dignity and accustom yourself to the right actions in specific situations. To cast aside doubts, study signs of a confident woman or girl in the photo, what she is ? Do you want to be like her?

Psychologist's Tips for Developing Good Traits in Confident People

If you answered yes to the question asked by the paragraph above, then:

  • stop feeling sorry for yourself all the time;
  • treat yourself with respect;
  • keep an eye on appearance and smile more often;
  • strive for self-realization;
  • decide what you really want to do, what gives you pleasure.

Step-by-step instruction

To listen to the advice of experts or not is everyone's personal business. The result largely depends on the seriousness of the perception. Remember, female self-confidence is not able to develop from scratch, in a static state you will not achieve anything. It is very important to understand the task in detail and boldly move towards its solution. This should be done in stages, thoughtfully.

  • Record your own achievements and successes. Ignore those who say that writing is meaningless. After all, people tend to forget about the small successes that take place in their lives. This is absolutely impossible to allow.
  • Try to fight your fear. Achieving the desired result involves constantly overcoming obstacles on the way to it. Until you make a bunch of mistakes and learn how to correct them yourself, you should not count on winning. Only experience, often difficult, allows us to reach the sky-high heights to which we strive so much.
  • Say no to comparison. How to look and feel confident? This is not possible if you constantly engage in comparisons with others. Self-esteem from this is rapidly declining.
  • Take failures calmly. Do not concentrate on them too much, do not make the eternal torment into the meaning of life. Digging through the negative day after day, going over the worst in your mind, you will never dare to make an important decision. Understand that mistakes and difficulties are the lot of absolutely everyone. Only someone overcomes them with dignity, and someone prefers to suffer in inaction. It's up to you to choose.
  • Criticism is not always beneficial. Proven by psychologists. For those who are constantly reproached and criticized at an early age, it is much more difficult to overcome the fear of doing something wrong in the future. Set yourself up to communicate with exceptionally kind people who do not shower you with claims, discontent, or poke you at failure for no reason.
  • Work on your manner of speaking. Speak slowly, speak the words so as not to be misunderstood. Speak up, feel free to share your opinion with others.
  • Get in the habit of complimenting yourself. Anyone needs it a woman to gain self-confidence ... Constant encouraging thoughts will not make you wait long for the result. You yourself will feel how from the praise you will want to immediately start new achievements.

How can psychologist Daria Milay help?

If you cannot cope with the difficulties that arise on your own, you should enlist the support of a specialist. Sign up for a consultation, and Daria Milay will help you:

  • significantly improve self-esteem;
  • anticipate and overcome the process of self-destruction;
  • overcome the fear of the unknown and cope with depression;
  • set yourself up for openness and active communication with others;
  • understand how to become self-confident.

A decisive person has a good sense of humor, looks straight, does not bend under the mental burden of circumstances. To achieve this, you need to overcome numerous barriers every day and constantly work on yourself. Take on a few more useful tips:

  • Joke and have fun. A positive attitude attracts people who will certainly want to recharge them. Communicate freely, be open.
  • Make eye contact with the person you are talking to. A glance aside speaks of insincerity. Nobody likes a lie, don't forget
  • If someone doubts your ability, don't overreact. Understand yourself, think about why they think so. Gradually train yourself to think that everything will work out, you will overcome everything.

Summing up, we will remind once again to understand how to give a girl or woman a confident look and develop self-confidence , you cannot sit back. You need to act, engage in self-development, master skills and instill good habits. This is the only way to achieve impressive results.

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